Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Not much

So okay, procrastinate all I can is my mantra today I guess. Too tired to write. Althoguh I can say that the new polls about the president are suprising since half this country just re-elected him... I don't get it. What has changed in peoples views about the terror alerts and the lack of leadership from the president that they are now waking up and seeing? Why not a month ago???

Monday, December 20, 2004

work

So I have been having a little work problem recently. I have been sucked into theworld og blogging full force and have been spending way too much time reading about other peoples lives. Not sure if it is good that I am still getting my work done or bad because I am obviously doing it much faster.

It also makes me question what I am doing. Is this what I want to be doing in life? Who knows? It seems weird to always be questioning and to be working so much and not enjoying life. But then again, what is enjoying life? Why do we work...of course to make money to do things we want to do...seems like a vicious cycle to me.

hmmmm

Four weeks from tomorrow and we leave for Africa. A group of family and friends are heading to Kilimanjaro for a nice winter hike....well, not so much a winters hike but 6 days of strenuous activity, sleeping in tents, not showering. Ick. Can we make it? I am getting nervous. We are doing the Machame Route (also our itinerary) which is a little less traveled and is suppose to have better views. It is in tents tough which may make it a little more interesting. I am excited to go as I think it will be a great adventure and a challenge. I have been reading many blogs about others trips and most have been positive, which does reassure me. It seems weird to think that we are going to climb the highest peak in Africa and they consider this a moderate hike.

At this point I keep going back and forth between excitement and nerves. The adventure and knowing that we are going someplace where they like to throw us in jail... At least it is a group of 10 so that is somewhat reassuring. Should be fun.

We have gotten all our shots, are applying for the visas, and are starting to get the list of what we need to buy. It is starting to freak me out a little.....

oh, and we need to finish Christmas shopping. Only a few more days.

Saturday, December 18, 2004

The Roomate (f)

The following is a little NC17 and is fiction. Fiction in this blog will be followed by (f) at the end of the entry from here on out. this is a rough draft of something somewhat fun....

This time I swear it's the last time. I can't take it. Men are such pigs and this one just fell asleep on me. Drunkin hoe. I thought for a minute about slapping the little bitch awake but that would not do me any good at the moment. I lifted myself off his still hard prick and let it fall onto his belly. I couldn't believe what was happening.

I had met this guy a month ago at the 19+ club called Tools. My friends and I had been there many times but this was the first time I decided to pick someone up...well dance with him at least. I saw him with his friends. He looked late twenties and lookded good in his jeans, and tight t-shirt. I could tell he worked out, which was more than I could say about my scawny little body. We made eye contact a couple of times as I danced and thrashed around the dance floor. I smiled and he walked over and joined me. We danced for an hour before he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close. I could feel his package hit my upper butt and smiled. The hardness of his stomach against my back flet so good. Nerves took over and I glanced over my shoulder? Does he really want me? I haven't done this, what am I doing? I couldn't believe what was happening. I was so pre-occupied I missed his name but was brought back by the electrity that shot through my body as his toungue made contact with the rim of my ear. I turned and looked at him. We were still dancing so I just smiled. He mouthed something and I leaned in to hear.

"You live around here?", he whispered, his breath sending chills down my spine.
"I live in NH. Go to school down here and need a break so we came out. You?"
"Down the street."
"Cool". Cool? That was pretty lame, I thought to myself.

We ended up driving him home and he have me his number..and his name. A few weeks later, my friends and I decided to go out again. Being away from school sucked and this was the only releif we got all summer.

We drove down and I had called Tom to see if he wanted to go out. So we did. I was so nervious I almost had my friends come with me. But I didn't. He took me to all these bars and suprising to me, I got in without being carded, which was good since I was only twenty. We were having a good time until this. My first real date in college and the guy passes out. What should I do? I thought to myself, straddling this guy. His lean body slowly rising and falling with his rythmic breathing, tickling my balls. I look down and bounce my meat a little as it slowly starts to deflate back to normal. I didn't even have time to get off but this guy obviously didn't care about that.

Is this what all men are like? I sighed and rolled off his body and laid beside him in the silence. The air conditioner kicked on, blowing a cool stream against my naked skin.

It was not really the end of the world I told myself. His shaved chest was more of a turn off than a turn on. Stubble I don't mind on the face, but the chest? Would it be as bad if he had just shaved? or waxed? And he was much too old for me. Here I was, a young kid and he was eight years older. What was I thinking? Who knows. I'm pissed and horny as hell. I wonder if his roomate is still awake.

A smile krept across my face as I thought about that. I had met his roomate a few hours ago before I went out with this thing beside me. His roomates name was Ben. He was about 5'10" and looked pretty solid. Should I? I mean, I am still horny and this guy is obviously not going to give me what I want. Glancing down, I stroked my growing meat and let that do the thinking for me. What could it hurt? But I had to pee.

The bed creaked as I slowly stood. Glancing down at Tom, he stirred but did not wake up. I krept to his door and slowly opened it trying to be careful. My eyes had adjusted to the light but I krept slowly next door as this was not my house and I did not know the layout. I managed to make it passed Ben's door without looking and sat on the toilet and peed. I cleaned up as much as I could from my incomplete experience and flushed. I turned the light out and waited for my eyes to readjust. I walked over and couldn't help but look.

Ben's door was open and I could see his form lying in his bed. The street light cascaded over his body. He was lying on his stomach, facing me but his eyes were in shadows. He could tell by his breathing that he was sleeping. His back was smooth and musclular, leading down to the cutest bubble but I had ever seen. His boxer breifs were tight against it and follwed his form perfectly. His right leg was bent slightly, giving defination to his calf. He looked so peaceful. I toyed with the idea of going back to Tom and making him give me what I wanted. Go slap him awake and make him finish. But at the moment, I was in lust for Ben.

I was about to head back when movement from Ben on his bed so I froze. I thought I was caught, standing in the doorway with a semi-hard on, watching this adonis sleep. But he was just rolling over. I sighed but was able to see his full chest now. His defined pecs, smooth abs with just a hint of hair, leading down into his underware. He stretched out his leg, the muscles of his legs, breathing full in his skin. And I just stood there, looking at his package being shown through the folds on cloth that swaddled him. He must be having a good dream I thought because he was hard. I couldn't tell from the distance but it weaved up to the right, with the head hidden by shadows, making it look rather large. My body took over and I walked into the room. Dare I? I couldn't I thought but I was already standing by the edge of the bed. I just wanted to touch him, to hold him in my arms. I was in love with this guy that I had met for 5 minutes and just wanted to jump him.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Get Something Down

Finish it.
Continue to follow the words until the last
key is hit.
Just one a day is the goal.
Something to keep the creative mind afloat.
To help lift the spirit
or bring it down.
To stop the procrastination
that creeps up from fear.

Some will be bad, face it.
Others may touch lives forever.
but you wont know unless you get it down.

So take 5, 10, or 30 to
creat,
explore, imagine,
the possibilties that lay
at your fingertips.
Close your eyes and relive,
change it, and moves on.
Just touch the keys and tap, tap, tap.

Even nothing is better than nothing.
Ramble through your mind
and let fate bring us into focus.
Use it,
that is what it is there for.

And with that,
you are complete.--10/03

Starting out...

So here I am world. Ready to start telling everyone what the hell is going on in life. I recently started reading some blogs like www.peaeye.net, www.thecorky.com, and www.boysbriefs.com and just found it facinating and mildly interesting. As a writer, a million ideas started popping into my head about characters and how people relate to each other. The internet is an interesting place and now we can read about people who we have never met. It is all one big chapter in life that we are all part of. I started thinking about it and thought that what the hell, I'd give it a try.

I am a 27 year old married gay male living in Boston. I love Boston and have lived here for the past 9 years except for a one year stint in San Francisco. I mainly thought to start this blog as a means toshare my thoughts on life and to try to get out some of the creative energy that is stuck in me. I write, paint, and am starting on a new adventure in design....which is not my current job but I digress. Let's see how this goes.

I am planning for this blog to be taken in two parts, one as a live journal, another as a means to get some of my writing out there. We'll see how it goes. Until then, I'll keep trying to think of what to say.